I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
