i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
