Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
