You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
