i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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