it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
