Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
