In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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