I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
