great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize