I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
