I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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