what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
