Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
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