Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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