I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I could fuck to npr.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
