Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize