You're a womanizer and a bitch.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
