Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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