I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
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