i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
third nipple confirmed
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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