Pappa wants mamma naked
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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