Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
