there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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