Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
