All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
