So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
