why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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