My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
