Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
