I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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