So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
