Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
