love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
