I hate your face
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
