I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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