this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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