You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
