maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
