It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
