In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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