Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
