quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
