my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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