people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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