well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
