i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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