is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
