I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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