garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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